#1 in the lies of Troy Hawkins series.
Troy's hacking powers were legendary. He hacked into the UN mainframe computer, and sent 800 tanks to Egypt. However, his actions were traced, and he was fined fifty million pounds, which would have financially crippled most schoolchildren. Troy, however, was lucky in that respect, as his father invented Windows with Bill Gates. Bill Gates was more than happy to pay the bill, what with his good friend having invented Windows with him, and that.

A boy in my year called Ajasz Sunesh was a massive bullshitter. His tales usually involved an uncle or cousin. His best effort was telling us that his uncle (who lived in Los Angeles) got caught by the LAPD with $50,000 worth of Crack-cocaine in the boot of his car. He managed to batter the 3 policemen single-handedly, and evade arrest.
However, Ajasz's uncle was soon caught by the American Army, as he was already wanted for something else, but he managed to shake them off in his mega-fast sports car.
At this point Ajasz's uncle thought that a trip back to England might be a good idea, so he went to catch a plane from L.A airport. Uncle knew that he had a gun in his belt, so as he passed through the metal detector, he threw it over the top and caught it on the other side, without being caught!
Even Ajasz knew to stop the story there. Which upset us all.

There was a lad at our school called Jamie Moulding who lied through his teeth about most things, mainly his archimedes computer at home. A completely fictitious computer in actual fact. He was however a complete genius on our school bbc micros and regularly wrote complicated code programmes to bring the school network to a halt. Halfway through the 5th form he simply disappeared with no explanation. Some fifteen years later I am bored at work googling everyones name I could think of and lo and behold he had been expelled for hacking into a russian military compuer and trying to sell secrets to the FBI.CIA (can't remember). To top it all off he got all his phone bills paid for by the school. Clever cunt.

Back in the heady days when Windows 95 had just come out, it took about a month before someone at school realised how to make it crash. A suprising amount of ingenuity was displayed by a small group of 14-yr old boys, who, by a system of trial and error, made a map of the entire school computer network. Armed merely with a floppy disk containing a program called "winbomb", they then wielded the power to crash anyones pc remotely at any time. Absolutely hilarious when someone's just written 500 words on Oxbow lakes and not yet saved the document.

Copies of this map, and the program, were like gold-dust WMDs. Nazi-type interrogations, bag & locker searches, and many assembly speeches were dedicated to retrieving and destroying as many copies as possible. Realising it was a lost cause (after about 3 months) our IT technicians reverted the system back to Windows 3.1. Supershit.

Sorry - I just realised this entry isn't in the least bit funny. Log - please edit. Or Nick Hunt. He's good.