Porn King
A nickname I earned thanks to my sterling efforts to stay one step ahead of the IT department, and ensure that all pupils got to look at boobs on the newly installed computers.

My budding porn empire came crashing down when I was confronted by a PE teacher holding a print-out of a picture of a lady pleasuring herself with a cucumber, and the question "is this your mum?"
written by Mr*Le*on, approved by Phil