As 16-year olds in December 1985, we thought it would be supremely adult to buy some beers, dog off school, and go round to Stephen Wyper’s house to watch the Australia v Scotland World Cup qualifier. Just like real men. At 9.30 in the morning. Rather surprisingly, it wasn’t such a good idea. Mark Sneddon spent the match complaining that he was never going to lose his virginity, went into French class pissed up after the game, told Miss Cumming to fuck off, vomited all over his jotters, and got us all called up in front of the headmaster. And it wasn’t even a decent game.