geordie racer
Readers! An intriguing conundrum for you now. Two wholly unrelated submissions landed with a 'whump' recently, both bearing the title 'Geordie Racer'. So, was Geordie Racer a short-lived kids drama, or a crap computer game? Or possibly even both? Answers on the back of a pack of Sovereigns to the usual address. Firstly, from Anna Williams:
At primary school in the late eighties, bored children were forced to watch a drama series about a geordie kid and his prized pigeon, 'Blue flash'. No-one I've spoken to can remember the plot, but it caused my entire class to shriek "Blue flash!" in a falsetto geordie accent every time they saw a bird zoom across the playground.
And an alternate theory from the imaginatively-monikered Mary Woozley:
A shitty computer game, which required you to choose one of three pigeons, and then come up with as many words as possible using the letters in said pigeon's name. However, the sheer rubbishness of the game meant that it would accept almost any combination of letters, provided the pigeon's name had them all. Naturally, everybody chose the pigeon Bonny, and typed in 'nob'.
written by Ma*y W*ozl*y, An*a Wi*lia*s, approved by Conor

I don't remember much about the plot, either, apart from one scene in the first episode where 'egg' was mis-spelled 'eeg' in an ad in a local newsagent's window.
written by Ne*l Vom*t, approved by Rosy

Ms Williams and Ms Woozley are both correct. Geordie Racer was one of the classic stories in the "Look and Read" series. The genius BBC marketing department obviously saw the opportunities in the TV/gaming tie-in and developed a rubbish 4-colour blocky graphics spin-off game for the BBC computer.

The game can be downloaded here, along with other big name titles such as Suburban Fox and Martello Tower. No sign of Granny's Garden, unfortunately.

written by an*nym*us *ser, approved by Rosy