zen exam question
Urban Myth: A philosophy student receives his exam paper, on which the only question is: "Is this a question?" The student, in his infinite wisdom, writes: "If this is an answer." He gets an A.
This is clearly fibbery of the highest order.
This is clearly fibbery of the highest order.
written by Al*stai* Gray, approved by Log
Urban myth: Again a philosophy exam, the question is 'What is courage?' Answer: 'This is'. He gets an A too. Bollocks.
written by an*nymou* u*er, approved by Susan
And of course, Philosophy student gets the question "Why?", and answers "why not?".
Again, clearly a big stinking supergay lie.
Again, clearly a big stinking supergay lie.
written by excluded pupil, approved by Susan
I once went into an RE exam totally unprepared and having paid no attention all term. To the question, "Who led the Jews to the promised land?" I wittily answered "Father Christmas" - which apparently was so very wrong that not only did I not get an A but I had to write a formal apology to the head of Divinity, who had apparently had a nervous breakdown while marking my exam paper.
Okay, he didn't, he just got a bit pissed off. After all, I was mocking his entire career, the God-bothering fuck.
Okay, he didn't, he just got a bit pissed off. After all, I was mocking his entire career, the God-bothering fuck.
written by excluded pupil, approved by Log
Our combined science teacher told us this...
An exam paper began. Please read all questions before starting. There were 100 questions, the last question said. "Don't answer any of the above questions".
1. That's not a question,
2. It's bullshit.
3. He has over 15 job interviews at other schools in one year and didn't get a single one.
An exam paper began. Please read all questions before starting. There were 100 questions, the last question said. "Don't answer any of the above questions".
1. That's not a question,
2. It's bullshit.
3. He has over 15 job interviews at other schools in one year and didn't get a single one.
written by Jo*n G*rn*r, approved by Susan
Our R.E. teacher once set us the homework question "what is the meaning of life?" Only slightly beyond the scope of a 2nd year religious education course. What if one of us had got it right, though? That would have fucked him up.
written by an*nymou* us*r, approved by Susan
Our RE teacher, before her nervous breakdown, was a rabid Christian of the very worst kind. Unfortunately she was responsible for marking the end of year exam paper in comparative religion. We were asked "What are the main features of Taoism?"
Those of us who answered correctly did extremely badly on this exam, as the answer she was looking for was something along the lines of "godless heathen mud people."
Those of us who answered correctly did extremely badly on this exam, as the answer she was looking for was something along the lines of "godless heathen mud people."
written by Ja*min* Str*ng, approved by Conor
I took the exam mentioned in which the first instruction was to read all the instructions, and the last instruction was to ignore all the other instructions and do nothing.
It wasn't a formally assessed exam; the assessment came during the exam as those of us (a surprisingly large number) who had actually read all the questions sat smugly whilst our contemparies did such things as " 4) If you are the first to get to this instruction, say in a loud voice 'I am the best at following instructions'" and "13) Stand up and turn all the way around once".
Most impressive was the insistence of one of the hapless spazzes, who claimed he did read all the instructions and knew that he wasn't supposed to do anything, but did it anyway for reasons he chose not to divulge.
It wasn't a formally assessed exam; the assessment came during the exam as those of us (a surprisingly large number) who had actually read all the questions sat smugly whilst our contemparies did such things as " 4) If you are the first to get to this instruction, say in a loud voice 'I am the best at following instructions'" and "13) Stand up and turn all the way around once".
Most impressive was the insistence of one of the hapless spazzes, who claimed he did read all the instructions and knew that he wasn't supposed to do anything, but did it anyway for reasons he chose not to divulge.
written by Ji*bo *., approved by Log
I had the following question on a philosophy degree finals paper: "Could you have done anything other than answer this question?"
Being a philosophy student, I'd spent all my time drinking red wine and wearing berets in a fug of existential despair instead of doing any actual work, so to this day I have no idea whether I answered it or not.
Being a philosophy student, I'd spent all my time drinking red wine and wearing berets in a fug of existential despair instead of doing any actual work, so to this day I have no idea whether I answered it or not.
written by an*ny*ous u*er, approved by Matt
What a treat! Another exam based urban myth for you to enjoy, posted, we might add, at no small personal risk - last time we poached off Snopes we had them chucking rocks at the LOTP skylight all fucking night.
Four college students get monumentally pissed the night before an important exam. They wake up late the next day to find they have missed the exam, so they all go off to see their tutor. They explain that they'd gone on a trip the day before, but had got a punctured tyre leaving them stranded miles away with no chance of getting back for the exam.
The tutor agrees to give them the benefit of the doubt and lets them take the exam the next day. He places them all in separate rooms and gives them a question paper each.
There are only two questions. The first is fairly straightforward and worth 5%, and all the students answer it easily.
They turn over to the second question, which is worth 95% - "Which tyre?"
A good old fashioned comedy double-take is, I think, implied.
Four college students get monumentally pissed the night before an important exam. They wake up late the next day to find they have missed the exam, so they all go off to see their tutor. They explain that they'd gone on a trip the day before, but had got a punctured tyre leaving them stranded miles away with no chance of getting back for the exam.
The tutor agrees to give them the benefit of the doubt and lets them take the exam the next day. He places them all in separate rooms and gives them a question paper each.
There are only two questions. The first is fairly straightforward and worth 5%, and all the students answer it easily.
They turn over to the second question, which is worth 95% - "Which tyre?"
A good old fashioned comedy double-take is, I think, implied.
written by Iv*n V*si*levic*, approved by Jamie