| Report for Sticky Knickers | |
|---|---|
| Approved stories | 2 |
| Rejected stories (hidden) | 1 |
| Deleted stories (hidden) | 2 |
| Summary | Could Try Harder |
For children who were spared the New-age horrors of a 'progressive' or 'modern learning' environment at school, the Christian names of teachers were shrouded in taboo and mystery, and their discovery led to the instant humanisition of the teacher, leading to weakness and misery.
One teacher to succumb was a Mrs Judith Clarke. After almost a year of listening to 'Hey Jude, don't make it bad...', we soon evolved into 'Hey Jude begin' (at the start of the class - clever), 'Hey Jude, don't be a gay' (I'm not saying we were funny, just persistent) 'remember to let her under your foreskin', and most poignantly, 'Hey Jude, don't have a spazz'.
Unfortunately one day she did just that, throwing all the books off her desk, and shedding bitter tears, she upped and left to a fanfare of 'naa na na na-na na-na, na-na na-na, hey Judy Judy Jude' still ringing in her ears.
A hard fought victory.
One teacher to succumb was a Mrs Judith Clarke. After almost a year of listening to 'Hey Jude, don't make it bad...', we soon evolved into 'Hey Jude begin' (at the start of the class - clever), 'Hey Jude, don't be a gay' (I'm not saying we were funny, just persistent) 'remember to let her under your foreskin', and most poignantly, 'Hey Jude, don't have a spazz'.
Unfortunately one day she did just that, throwing all the books off her desk, and shedding bitter tears, she upped and left to a fanfare of 'naa na na na-na na-na, na-na na-na, hey Judy Judy Jude' still ringing in her ears.
A hard fought victory.
A friend of mine had a variation on that trick, but with less build up and panache:
Greeny cocked and ready he would get a girl to open her mouth by simply saying 'Open wide, go on. Nothing'll happen...' and saying 'trust me' repeatedly, coupled with pleas of 'come on, why don't you trust me?'.
Then phutt - a rolled-over tongue shot ripe green straight in. Not everyone was so trusting, and it often took considerable leg work to secure a victim, sometimes more than one day.
It wouldn't have surprised anyone if he'd gone through a romantic montage with a girl, ice-skating and running along beaches, simply to shoot some snot into a girl.
Greeny cocked and ready he would get a girl to open her mouth by simply saying 'Open wide, go on. Nothing'll happen...' and saying 'trust me' repeatedly, coupled with pleas of 'come on, why don't you trust me?'.
Then phutt - a rolled-over tongue shot ripe green straight in. Not everyone was so trusting, and it often took considerable leg work to secure a victim, sometimes more than one day.
It wouldn't have surprised anyone if he'd gone through a romantic montage with a girl, ice-skating and running along beaches, simply to shoot some snot into a girl.