Report for Nick Malden
Approved stories1
SummaryPerfectly Exquisite

KEITH We had two lab assistants at school. A normal one, and Keith. In your first physics lesson at school, the teacher told you never to tap him on the shoulder or surprise him from behind, due to his epilepsy. We just had to find out, so there followed an evil version of "What's the time Mr Wolf?" where we crept up when he had his back turned and froze as he spun round, pretending we weren't doing anything, with him freaking out more and more as we got closer and closer, until finally we were within tapping distance, by which time he was frothing at the mouth and the teacher would turn up. "What's happened to Keith?" "Dunno sir - he just started going weird....is he OK sir?" Keith, a god-fearing fellow, also went to church every Sunday, often driving his tiny MG. One Sunday a group of boys from the school, picked his car up, moved it across the church driveway, and wrote "666" in the gravel where the car had been. It took them a LONG time to sort him out after that one....