| Report for Josh G | |
|---|---|
| Approved stories | 2 |
| Rejected stories | 3 |
| Deleted stories (hidden) | 3 |
| Summary | Mean Boy |
Down at fraggle rock, grab a fraggle by its cock,
Twirl it in the air, by its pubic hair,
Chuck it on the grass, ram a chainsaw up its ass,
Turn the power on, now the fraggles gone.
Twirl it in the air, by its pubic hair,
Chuck it on the grass, ram a chainsaw up its ass,
Turn the power on, now the fraggles gone.
Sounds like Matthew Rees to me...
Everyone hated old matthew, everyone, including the teachers, stories are plentyful.. but I shall condense them...
Year 8 - Science, Matthew, aka "Cheese Ranger" has a perforated eardrum, which is due for impending surgery, unfortunatley, Mr Atkinson is a psyco, and seeing the appaling state of Cheezys handwriting, slams a 3 foot board ruler on his desk, bursting matthews eardrum even more...crying and laughter ensue... watching old atkinson in his ever irritating scouse way to try and make friends and therefore, avoiding getting sued is priceless
Year 10 - The boredom of Short Course GCSE Welsh is alleviated by alchoholic dimwit Mr Pritchard asking Matthews "friend" Ian "Pwy ydy Matthew?" (What is matthew?) to which Ian responds "Mae Matthew Yn Ranger Caws" (Which was almost certainly meant 2 mean "Matthew is a cheese ranger" class and teacher laugh...matthew cries... pattern here?
Year 13 - Being the cream of the school, u think he'd get cut some slack, but oh no... when walking to history, past a corridor of form 1 and 2 kids, cheezy gets that old classic the gob shower, and physically has to run to his lesson.... His status was done no favours by the fact that he told a teacher, and that said teacher, hated him, the reply of "Fuck off matthew", tore what little dignity he had left away....
Knowing my luck, in a few years he'll be a multi millionaire...
Everyone hated old matthew, everyone, including the teachers, stories are plentyful.. but I shall condense them...
Year 8 - Science, Matthew, aka "Cheese Ranger" has a perforated eardrum, which is due for impending surgery, unfortunatley, Mr Atkinson is a psyco, and seeing the appaling state of Cheezys handwriting, slams a 3 foot board ruler on his desk, bursting matthews eardrum even more...crying and laughter ensue... watching old atkinson in his ever irritating scouse way to try and make friends and therefore, avoiding getting sued is priceless
Year 10 - The boredom of Short Course GCSE Welsh is alleviated by alchoholic dimwit Mr Pritchard asking Matthews "friend" Ian "Pwy ydy Matthew?" (What is matthew?) to which Ian responds "Mae Matthew Yn Ranger Caws" (Which was almost certainly meant 2 mean "Matthew is a cheese ranger" class and teacher laugh...matthew cries... pattern here?
Year 13 - Being the cream of the school, u think he'd get cut some slack, but oh no... when walking to history, past a corridor of form 1 and 2 kids, cheezy gets that old classic the gob shower, and physically has to run to his lesson.... His status was done no favours by the fact that he told a teacher, and that said teacher, hated him, the reply of "Fuck off matthew", tore what little dignity he had left away....
Knowing my luck, in a few years he'll be a multi millionaire...
Well, our school sanctioned Ska band began as the infamous "Geoffs Magic Touche"... quite what was so magical about Geoff and his touche one can only wonder, but from then it descended into madness, proof that the infamous "put lots of words into a hat" trick to pick a band name should never be used "Willys 20-Bag", "Dubious Magic Cabbage" and the frankly ingenious "Disproportional Nutjob" were all considered...
All being said, I think we were the only people to ever say "fuck" on stage at a school christmas concert.... thats punk rock baby... or something....
All being said, I think we were the only people to ever say "fuck" on stage at a school christmas concert.... thats punk rock baby... or something....
Mel Smell.
Real name: Unknown, almost certainly not "Mel" but hey, it ryhmes
Subject: Physics, apparently, but it seemed to us that his talents involved staring at the ceiling, not washing, and letting his trousers hang dangerously low
Remarks: Possibly the stupidest man ever to graduate Cambridge with 1st class degrees in physics and maths... possibly... Got angina, left, replaced by an actual teacher, removed all fun from GCSE Pysics...
Goading methods: Sitting at the back of the class, quietly humming constantly, when he approaches to investigate, stop, and at the same time a fellow antagonist at the front starts humming at the same pitch, when he goes back 2 the front, u start again... Repeat until he's driven to the point of going next door to seek assistance, provoking the immortal line "Mr Protheroe, someones humming, and I dont know who it is!!!"...
God rest his soul...oh wait hes not dead... I dont think...
Real name: Unknown, almost certainly not "Mel" but hey, it ryhmes
Subject: Physics, apparently, but it seemed to us that his talents involved staring at the ceiling, not washing, and letting his trousers hang dangerously low
Remarks: Possibly the stupidest man ever to graduate Cambridge with 1st class degrees in physics and maths... possibly... Got angina, left, replaced by an actual teacher, removed all fun from GCSE Pysics...
Goading methods: Sitting at the back of the class, quietly humming constantly, when he approaches to investigate, stop, and at the same time a fellow antagonist at the front starts humming at the same pitch, when he goes back 2 the front, u start again... Repeat until he's driven to the point of going next door to seek assistance, provoking the immortal line "Mr Protheroe, someones humming, and I dont know who it is!!!"...
God rest his soul...oh wait hes not dead... I dont think...
Never convincingly covered up with overtures of an embarrassed "I was only kidding, Jesus" or, even worse, "I only said it to see if anyone else would say yes..."
No you weren't, you ate your wank and everyone now knows it.
No you weren't, you ate your wank and everyone now knows it.