Coke Can Turd

At one point during the moral and sociological evolution of our class, superiority over others suddenly came down to one thing and one thing only: the girth of your shit. Ludicrous Pythonesque exaggerations flew thick and fast, but Big Dai Morgan's solemn claim that he'd laid one as thick as a Coke can while out camping the previous week was both horrifying and oddly believable.